Resting day.

It’s so beautiful this afternoon. Today was a day for my additional MRI tests. Even though I medicated last night and during the night with steroids and Benadryl I had a reaction to the contrast dye just like last week. I had to get IV Benadryl before I could leave the hospital. Not truly unexpected on my part. We arrived home about 1230 and I proceeded to go to sleep with him at say 15 minutes or maybe 30 minutes. And I didn’t wake up until 5 o’clock. For me the IV Benadryl is kind of like being in a coma . I know my ever watchful angel Brett was here all afternoon with me and my big girl Layla lay right beside me while I slept on the couch. I’m awake now but I’m in a fog and I hate that feeling . It’s the kind of fog that makes arms and legs feel like they’re moving through quicksand and to me it’s very uncomfortable because I’m used to moving around at a zippy pace before I got sick. There are so many things that I’d like to be doing like cutting back the crêpe Myrtle’s or snipping the tendrils off the wisteria or even folding a load of laundry at this point looks good. But it’s really hard just to move enough to do those things it seems monumental. I did get up and make tuna fish salad for dinner so Brett would eat . So very simple empty three cans of tuna in a Tupperware container , peel the already hard-boiled eggs, cut up onion in small diced pieces, add a little bit of garlic and dice up some pickles , and add mayonnaise. Stir. Add some pepper to taste because I’m a Pepper fanatic . But all the while I felt like it took me an hour to make the tuna fish salad . I’m sending for a few minutes outside at the patio table.Enjoying the afternoon sun and I would love to be in the swimming pool. Right now I feel like it would take someone to strip off my clothes and apply my swimming suit. Ughh. I don’t think I’m depressed I feel pretty good mentally. I’m not worried about much but this morning I was nervous as a cat before this MRI test for some reason . I’ve said my prayers and I know it’s all in gods hands and he’ll tell me what to do’s been doing that ever since I got sick. I miss playing golf! I miss walking the dogs! I miss my husband! He’s here but I’m asleep some days it seems like 18 hours a day . I would love to be restored near full health . I continue to ask for divine intervention and direction on how to approach this condition. I just found out a childhood friend Anita was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma . So I’m praying for her and praying for other people that I know that having suffering going on and others that I don’t know they’re suffering . I’m praying for people I don’t know like the congressmen that were shot in the DC security agents that were shot yesterday. I’m laying inside the MRI up to this morning and had a nice long time of prayer with my Lord. It calms me down to pray while I lay inside the tube and helps me to relax while the tests are being done. I know I’ll spend some of the evening and probably all night sleeping off the Benadryl hangover and I’m hoping that I wake up tomorrow feeling good . Been quite a while since I’ve had a good day .  I thank God for the good things in my life of which I still have a full cup.

Peace and blessings.


Sleeping and sleeping..

The past two weeks have been very, very different. Before I had nights that I couldn’t sleep at all. This was because my blood pressure kept going up extremely high and my heart rate going up like a jackhammer. Since then my labwork came back abnormal again which is no surprise. I saw the doctor a little over a week ago and he said that we have to get more aggressive looking for the secreting tumor that’s causing all the symptoms. Yay I can’t believe somebody finally said the words “get aggressive”. After all it’s only been going on for six months And I have finally gotten to where I couldn’t walk up steps couldn’t walk for more than about hundred yards straight and have lost my ability to play golf or even swing a golf club or play with the dogs. All of this since Christmas and at that time I was going to the YMCA with Kathleen three nights a week at least and walking on the treadmill for 30 minutes or more without any problem and sneaking off to work on my golf swing any time that I had more than five minutes! A lot has gone wrong over the last five months. I got a call from the doctors office last Wednesday. Alex told me that my lab work was all “very abnormal”. I’ve been so sick that I didn’t even ask what tests and how abnormal…which is totally out of character for me. He said Dr. Latif wanted to get MRI scans as soon as possible of my full spine, chest, abdomen and pelvis. He also doubled one of the medicines I was on which had just been doubled the week before. And he started me on an 8th medication another beta blocker . I had two MRI scans yesterday morning . Lucky me I had an allergic reaction to the dye and they had to give me Benadryl 50 mg IV to shut it down . I have made up on my sleep since then Benadryl knocks me out, but with IV Benadryl I pretty much could have surgery done and never know it. I have slept for 18 hours straight with one bathroom break. The new medicines have knocked my blood pressure and heart rate too low.  I’m going to stop the new beta blocker. My arms and legs feel like noodles and when I get up all I can hear is that buzzing in my ears. You know the buzzing…the kind you get right before you pass out. I’ve been drinking water like crazy to keep blood volume up. This sucks. I have two more MRIs next Thursday. I will lose a full day then too because I have to pre medicate with steroid and Benadryl this time. I’ll keep you posted….too tired now. Still praying they find the little sucker so they can take it out. Peace and blessings.